A Feared Entry

"I've learnt some important lessons this week.

- If you don't hold energy, be calm.

- Absorb before you react.

- Whisky and coke is not nice.

- Free ice cream tastes amazing.

- Letting go of people that damage your presence is a good thing.

- You won't always get 100% from everyone.

In truth, I realise they sound like fairly obvious life lessons. But this week, they took me by surprise.

By the middle of the week, I couldn't see past my own bubble.

And that felt lousy.

I was show that often I expect too much and become blind to my own efforts.

Without warning, I became lost in other's success and my own self-perceived inadequacy.

Towards Friday, I over shared my own stories after too much rum and felt a heavy pang of regret the next. I was encased in my own naivety and thus, sought consolidation in too many cups of coffee.  

It all became a little tragic.

However now, after much self-criticism, I'm letting this sea of crazy wash by. I'm watching as the tide rolls out.

Gracefully.

I'm currently en route to a close friend's new venture. A place he's finally thought highly of. He's doing better now, he's successful in his own right, and will continue to be.

And that, makes me more proud than anything.

I won't be scared of other's success. I'll embrace it.

And hope these successes bring me more free ice cream.

It feels good to write freely again."

❊