Tuesday, 28 January 2014

Expectations vs. Results

Recently, I've come to realise (and it's been mentioned by many) that I function on anxious energy.
So when the time came for me to take my Driving Theory Test, you can only imagine the terror that struck me.

Being of this anxious nature, my expectation was that I wouldn't pass - this worry was then thrust upon many people I care for (I apologise profusely). Predominantly, for me, the fear is what it means to fail.

What does it mean to fail?

I'm still largely unsure, and that's not because I've never failed at anything - believe me, I have - it's more because I'm not sure it means anything.
Take, for example, that 'diet' everyone's been meaning to start and stick to. Let's turn the idea around; that stranger you passed on the street, they don't give a damn what and how much you've eaten today. And neither does that guy who served you coffee.

Perhaps, failing [at that 'diet'] is just fine. So what you ate that cake? The world hasn't ended, and you are still very much alive.

I have learnt that:

  • The results often exceed expectations.
  • Failing doesn't make you a failure.
  • Theory tests aren't so bad.
  • You'll get there when the time is right - self hate isn't okay at any size.

Monday, 20 January 2014

The Importance Of: Why

At first, I didn't really understand. A little later I thought I had the right idea. And now, well now, I'm still working on it.

Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Coffee Rituals

Being an avid tea drinker myself (never English Breakfast might I add) I never quite understood the act of 'wake up, get a coffee and go' I'd seen so many people perform.

This was all true up until a few months ago. As I began working at Hoxton North Coffee, Espresso & Brew Bar I didn't fully understand the widely celebrated human habit of a coffee in the morning, or one in the afternoon to keep you going. 
Further in, my curiosity for coffee and individual habits grew and grew. Observing customers' orders and personal rituals allowed me to understand the little fix one can obtain from coffee and a cheeky cake or pastry.

And now, around two or so months in, after attaining some knowledge and making cups of coffee I'm beginning to understand why it is one of the most popular drinks in the world. I've even enjoyed the odd cup myself!

Today, yesterday, the day before (even on the days when I'm not working) I have learnt things I'm proud of and recognise as influential. Not only that, but I also sense how fortunate I am to work in a place that interests me immeasurably whilst allowing me to keep my passion for learning ablaze.

Saturday, 4 January 2014

The Velveteen Rabbit


"What is REAL?" Asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves for a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become real."

"Does it hurt?" Asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

Wednesday, 1 January 2014

Healthy 10

10 things that make me feel healthy!

  1. Eating well rounded meals - breakfast, lunch and dinner.
  2. Exercise - especially Yoga and swimming.
  3. Seeing my family and investing in my relationships - there are very few people I'd rather spend my time with and actively participating in the love shared between me and another makes me feel alive.
  4. Accepting and seeking help/advice from others - I'm slowly learning that there's no shame in needing a little guidance every now and then. After all, no man is an island.
  5. A good chat - knowing when it's time to just sit and talk about the world and where I am brings me great comfort.
  6. Brisk walking against the wind - I can feel the wind go by when I run. It feels good. It feels fast.
  7. Knowing I've made others feel good.
  8. Recognising that I can't control the universe. I am the water, not a rock.
  9. Sleeping 9 hours every night without interruption - Zzzz...
  10. Being mindful - it keeps me grounded and alive.